Challenge from a Stranger

One Saturday afternoon my sister and I met a friend for lunch. As we sat under the misters in the Arizona sun, we chatted about whatever was on our minds at the time: happenings in the lives of mutual friends, food, clothes, and other very deep topics (or at least entertaining to us!). After we had been there for several minutes, an older man came and sat at a table nearby ours. I looked at him curiously, as he was carrying a liter of 7 Up that was about a third full, a cup, and a string of large orange beads. He sat down and leaned back in his chair, appearing to be settling in for a relaxing time.

He did not seem interested in the menu, nor did he seem to have any intentions of ordering. Instead, he poured himself a bit of soda and began slowly sipping it. In his left hand, he held the string of beads, slowly playing with them in his hand, fingering each bead on the strand. A waiter came through and gave him a warm friendly hello – he seemed to know the man, or at least familiar with what may have been his regular presence at the restaurant. The waiter did not ask the man for an order or hand him a menu. When the waiter left, the man continued to sit, sip, and roll the beads in his left hand, as he looked off into the distance. He seemed resigned, yet content.

As I mentally distanced myself from our girlish chatter for a few moments, I observed this man and wondered. What was his story? Why did he have the beads? Were they a type of rosary and was he praying? Did he have memories at this restaurant that drew him there to enjoy the atmosphere, and perhaps remember? Why the 7 Up? (did he hate Coke?) My mind wandered as it explored various possibilities.

I would like to say that I had the courage to leave my table and ask the man some questions, and to find out his story. I wish I could piece my observations together with the actual facts. Instead, I stopped, observed, and then returned to the planned happenings of my day. However, seeing this man did not leave me wholly unchanged. In fact, in some ways, it left me challenged.

Do we take the time to understand people, to see beyond the surface? People are not just the friendly neighbor that waves, or the customer service representative that was rude on the phone, or a pesky telemarketer calling at dinner time, or a crabby customer that yelled at me on the phone. People are, well they are people.

They have feelings, struggles, insecurities, difficult circumstances, relationship issues, joys, people they deeply love and care about, the longing to be accepted and make a difference. A real and poignant example for me came up at work the other day. I learned that a woman that works for one of our vendors is a single mom working to support her children, while in treatment for a brain tumor. She is no longer just a person that helps me make things happen in my work. She is a person I can pray for and be caring toward.

In all ways, I want to see people beyond the surface, and learn more of their stories. To see people as God sees them, to reach into their lives, and to share with them my story too.